Well, at least we know the world is still spinning. The sun is still shining. And Taylor Swift makes loads of money singing about her ex-boyfriends. The target in Out of the Woods? One Direction’s Harry Styles. Yeah, I had to wikipedia it too. I’m getting old.

You have to hand it to Taylor Swift. The woman is a genius when it comes to the music business. Do people like to poke fun? Sure, but we all wish we had her bank accounts. The new song released at midnight, and featured enough Instagram posts to start wallpapering your house.

Swift has reassured fans that the 1989 record would feature a lot of heartbreak, but no one thought she was honestly going to stop shaking that money tree. It’s been too lucrative to just walk away.

Out of the Woods

Like every break-up song by Taylor Swift, you have to be a bit of an Internet detective to read between the lyrics. It’s not like she goes title track 3 – Harry Styles. So you have to match up the lyrics with stories in the press.

“Looking at it now/ Last December, we were built to fall apart/ Then fall back together.” Ok, to Google we go. You will find that the two were seen together. Check one box for the Styles.

“Your necklace hanging round my neck/ The night we couldn’t quite forget/ When we decided/ To move the furniture so we could dance/ Two paper airplanes flying, flying.” The two were spotted wearing the same paper airplane necklace together. Strike two, Harry. Plus, I think I just threw up in my mouth.

Where’s our strike three? A reference to a snowmobile accident that Taylor talked about in a recent Rolling Stone article. “Remember when you hit the brakes too soon/ Twenty stitches in a hospital room”

The chorus could include just about any guy in Taylor Swift’s life, so don’t expect that to yield any hints.

“Are we out of the woods yet?/ Are we out of the woods yet?/ Are we out of the woods yet?/ Are we out of the woods yet?” She also asks, again and again, “Are we in the clear yet?/ Are we in the clear yet?/ Are we in the clear yet?/ In the clear yet, good.”

Expect this to be on loop on just about every pop and country station in existence. If you have kids, well, learn to love it. Because they certainly will. Below are the Instagram posts building up the song’s release. Is it me, or are Instagram comments more insane than on YouTube?

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Tonight at midnight. #outofthewoods #1989

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#outofthewoods #itunes #midnight

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