A quick spoiler to Expendables 3. A running gag is Harrison Ford and Sylvester Stallone making fun of Jason Statham’s character for his British accent. Ford constantly tells him to quit mumbling. Surely I’m not the only moviegoer who watched the film and left wondering what the hell did Stallone just say?

I’d say I was missing important points in the movie, but let’s be real. The movie is everything the 80s gave us in action movies packaged with the same CG technology. Were they hand cranking the computers to render the explosions, or is this just a general ‘they don’t give a damn’.

The question is, should you see the movie? Well that depends. Are you expecting to walk out and go that was surprisingly deep and insightful? If so, you’ll be disappointed. If you are looking for enough one liners, a slightly deranged Wesley Snipes and a HGH-infused Stallone, then you have your ticket.

The movie is what the other two are, action fests with as little dialogue as possible. Jet Li looks like he has aged a century, and Arnold gets his choppa references in. Oh, and evidently Mel Gibson needed some walking around money. He plays the villain, and surprisingly doesn’t rail against Jews.

A return of Wesley Snipes is great, He gets in a dig about his jail time for tax evasion. After that, you can see the man still has the moves. Blade sequel anybody? He may have forgot his sword, but he has plenty of knives.

There is a running list of characters who decide they were just going to have fun and make a movie. Pick an old action star and he’s in it. Except Bruce Willis. He was replaced by Harrison Ford.

We will have a review up this weekend, but I think it’s time for Stallone to be subtitled in his movies. I don’t speak that botox, supplement laden dialect of English.

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