Kids are officially the digital generation. It used to be you could slap in a Disney DVD and give them a Happy Meal from McDonald’s and your day became a lot easier. Now? You have to worry about them racking up enough microtransactions on their iPad to equal your monthly mortgage.

Family research company, Smarty Pants, has released their popular brands index for kids ages 6-12. The winner? Apple’s iPad. Kids want their tablet. Oh, and a stack of Hershey’s, Oreos, M&Ms and Doritos. Those brands round out the top 5, respectively. Hell of a combination. Chocolate and Cool Ranch Doritos.

So, an iPad and junk food. Oh, and you better have wifi, but don’t expect to see Comcast on a top brand list anywhere. Disney wandered in at number 8, barely beating out YouTube. Looks like we are all getting old.

As for gaming, the Xbox brand beat out Playstation. That should piss off the PS4 fans. Now they will be railing against kids, instead of always-on. So, how did Smarty Pants conduct the survey? You’d think polling kids would be enough to drive you insane, but they managed to speak to 6,661 kids over a three-month span.

Over 256 brands were evaluated and given the Smarty Pants Kidfinity score. Ok, that’s an awesome name for branding. It measures love, popularity and brand awareness. Now, I feel old. I’m not sure I could name 256 brands in one sitting.

McDonald’s is not the brand behemoth it once was. It has dropped to 15th place. I guess apple slices instead of fries had a negative effect.

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iPad wasn’t always the darling of kids. It started its life ranked 109. See, it was the tablet that could.

Mom Rank

Not to be outdone by their crayon commandos, Smarty Pants also polled mothers. Yeah, the score is called Momfinity. Someone at the office watched Toy Story a little too much.

So, was iPad number one? No, it came in 30th, with Crayola grabbing the top spot. Yeah, that’s until your little artist goes Jackson Pollock on your wall. See how well you love crayons then. Rounding out the top five was Hershey’s, M&Ms,Oreos and Google. Yeah, I’d need a candy bar too if I saw what junior just did to living room wall.

So, can mom get the kids back to their crayons and away from the iPad? Not a chance, but Crayola should make a stylus to go with the Paper drawing app. I smell profit in the air.

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